D/s? D/s!

When I started tagging posts as “D/s” I didn’t realize that it has a different meaning to some people. Apologies if you’ve stumbled across this blog while searching for the latest and greatest in the world of video games. Ooops.

You Won’t Find It Here

I love to look at the list of search terms that brought people to my blog…

all purpose summer skirt  Sorry, I probably can’t help you. (But I noticed you looked twice just to make sure.)

largest Lips of the vulva  Can’t say I’ve written about those (and make no claim to having them), but I’m certain you’ll find a website out there that has written about it!

hot things  I can’t imagine you were actually looking for a submissive dating blog with this search, but that’s what you found. (And you must have liked it, since you looked at a couple pages.)

she is a submissive masturbator  I don’t really think of the act of masturbating as being particularly dominant or submissive, but the fantasies I have while masturabating certainly are submissive!

im submissive, can I ever be dominant  Embrace your submissive side! You’ll find my stories of exploring my dominant side, but it only took a few moments of exploration to discover that it wasn’t for me.

women who love smelly cocks  That’s definitely not a turn-on. (But I noticed you stuck around to look a little!)

submissive date  Now that’s one I can relate to!

Is Everyone on Vacation?

I’ve been blogging by proxy over the past week. I had several posts that went live at scheduled intervals while I enjoyed some rest and relaxation away from the Internet. Today, for the first time in a week, I got online to check my stats, and I see that the number of visitors to my blog has declined steadily over the last week. I usually only see that pattern when I don’t post regularly.

Is the world on vacation this week?

Stolen…

1. Height? 5’4″

2. Have you ever smoked heroin? Never!

3. Do you own a gun? Nope

4. Do you get nervous before “meeting the parents”? Yes, but parents seem to love me

7. What’s your favorite Christmas song? I love Christmas songs! Do I have to pick just one?

8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning? Water, or green tea

9. Can you do push ups? Sure, is there anyone who can’t?

10. Is your bathroom clean? More or less

11. What’s your favorite piece of jewelry? An antique Rolex that was my Grandmother’s

12. Do you like painkillers? No, I’ll usually suffer for a few hours because I optimistically believe the pain will go away (and by the time I break down, it’ll be 5 times worse)

14. Do you have A.D.D.? If I was in elementary school today, I’d be diagnosed with it. When I was in elementary school most teachers accurately recognized that I learned a lot quicker than my classmates, and dealt with it appropriately

16. Middle Name? It starts with an E

17. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment?
     a. Why am I wasting my time watching the Big Brother feed?
     b. I should really head to the farmer’s market before it gets too late
     c. I want a cupcake

18. Name the last 3 things you bought in the last day:
    a. Lunch at Whole Foods
    b. A bag of M&Ms
    c. Shaving gel

19. Name 3 drinks you regularly drink:
    a. Water
    b. Green tea
    c. Wine

20. Dream car? A luxury convertible sportscar

21. Favorite Concert? Coachella was pretty awesome

22. Current worry? Finding the time to finishing a big project by Monday

23. Current hate? This weather

24. Favorite place to be? On a ship, sitting on my balcony and watching the seemingly-endless ocean pass me by

25. Least favorite place to be? Standing in line

26. Where would you like to go? Everywhere I haven’t been before

27. Do you own slippers? No

28. What shirt are you wearing? A green cotton t-shirt

29. Do you burn or tan? I try to avoid both! But usually I burn first, then tan.

30. Favorite color? It depends on the context, but I love shades of purple (on my walls, in my clothing, on my slowly fading bruises)

31. Would you be a pirate? Uh, no thanks!

33. What songs do you sing in the shower? Nothing, actually.

34. What did you fear was going to get you at night as a child? Something hiding in my closet, or under my bed. (I’m not sure if I ever visualized it.)

35. What’s in your pocket right now? Nothing

36. Last thing that made you laugh? A funny email I got from a guy on Bondage.com

37. Best bed sheets as a child? Holly Hobby

38. Worst injury you’ve ever had? I’m a bit of a baby when it comes to pain (and fortunately haven’t hurt myself much)…a scraped knee that scarred, a minorly burned hand, a pulled back.

40. How many TVs do you have in your house? two

41. Who is your loudest friend? Gary

42. Who is your most silent friend? Leo

43. Does someone have a crush on you? I hope so!

44. Do you wish on shooting stars? Yes, but I infrequently see them because I live in the big, bright city.

45. What is your favorite book? I’ve read a couple hundred books in the last few years alone. (I keep a list.) It’s hard to narrow it down to just one.

46. What is your favorite candy? Right now, a Vosges Barcelona Bar (milk chocolate with pieces of smoked almonds and sea salt).

47. What song do/did you want played at your wedding? Joan Armatrading’s “Heaven”

48. What song do you want played at your funeral? Oh, there’s this hymn that I’ve heard played at several funerals, and I love it…I really should find out what it’s called.

49. What were you doing 12 AM last night? Getting settled into bed

50. If you were stranded on an island what would you want? A survival guide

The Proust Questionnaire

Stolen from Vanity Fair…

What is your idea of perfect happiness?
Sitting in an outdoor cafe a Campo di Fiore in Rome, enjoying a glass of wine with my true love while people watching, and knowing we’re heading back to our home to have delicious sex.

What is your greatest fear?
That’s I’ll never find my true love, or that I’ve found him and lost him.

If You Show Mine, Then I’ll Show Yours

I know I have readers…my site stats say it’s so. If you enjoy this blog and have one of your own, please link to me. And if you’re linking to me, please drop me a note or leave a comment so I can link to you, too. But I’d also love to hear from the readers who don’t blog. Please feel free to leave me a comment and let me know you’re out there.

Thanks!

J

I’m Back!

I wish I could say that I was off on a relaxing vacation, but it has actually been quite a few busy and exhausting weeks that’s included a couple guests from out-of-town, about 20 hours spent on airplanes, a couple weddings and the flu! But I’ve returned…I always do!

How Could I Have Forgotten?

In addition to the anniversaries mentioned in this post, this week marks a year since I’ve last had sex.

<sigh>

(And, yes, that does mean that the Dark Horse and I never consumated our relationship, according to Bill Clinton’s definition of sex.)

Sometimes it feels as if I’ve been in a life-long dry spell. When the sex is great, it seems that I’m in a long-distance relationship, where the sex is intense, but infrequent. As a 30something woman, I’ve had sex a lot less than the average woman. But on the bright side, maybe that just means I haven’t peaked yet!

RSS? RSS!

Warning: Geeky post ahead.  

At times, I’m what you’d call a late adopter. I hear about great technology, but it takes me forever to get around to trying it myself. Case in point: RSS feeds. I’d heard about them, but never got around to reading my favorite blogs that way. Every day, I’d page though my favorite blog bookmarks, checking each site to see if anything new had been posted. When a blog wasn’t updated frequently, I stop checking it regularly. (But only after checking it daily for a month or more, only to be disappointed because there were never any updated.) Muphy’s Law, 2007 corrallary: As soon as you stop checking a blog regularly, the blogger starts updating said blog.

I’ve Been Reading…

Since I started blogging, I’ve become a fan of more kinky blogs.

I love caitlin smiles because it’s a well-rounded blog written by the female submissive half of a kinky couple. Not only does she post about the pains and pleasures of their relationship, she talks about their families, health, pets and daily life. Since I’m ultimately seeking a relationship with a dominant guy, I always enjoy reading about the lives of other couples because it reminds me of what I’m looking for. (Submissive Reflections is another lifestyle blog written by a female submissive, and for a while now I’ve enjoyed her writing and their relationship.) In case you’re sensing a theme here, danae whispering is also written by the female submissive half of a kinky couple. Danae’s blog focuses less on the kink and more on the day-to-day joys and challenges of being in a relationship and living life through a BDSM prism. I always feel good after reading it because she always seems to look at the positive side of life, even when dealing with problems thrown her way.

There’s only one way to describe One Life, Take Two: HOT! It’s written by Jefferson, a bi-sexual, dominant guy who’s recently divorced, and who makes no apologies for the fact that he’s catching up on all of the sex he missed while married. (He recently mentioned that in 15 years of marriage, he didn’t get a single blow job.) Now he’s writing about all-male orgies, male & female orgies, online sex, BDSM sex camp, his male lovers, his female lovers. You name it, he’s done it. He’s a great writer, and knows how to craft a story.

One of my favorite blogs, Life As His, disappeared a month or two ago. This one was written by Annissa, who was a wife, mom, slave to her husband, domme to their “girl” and part of a poly-clan. In the last couple weeks Annissa posted a brief message on her LiveJournal Starting Over saying that she was no longer “his” (her husband and master, I presume) and that she’d post more later. That message has now disappeared, and her blog is blank again. Knowing the devastation I feel when a year or two-year relationship comes to an end, I can only start to imagine what she’s feeling. I hope she’ll start posting again, because I know it can be a good outlet for the grief. But it’s impossible to guess what her circumstances are, and it’s possible she’s not posting for privacy and security reasons. I hope she finds comfort.

As a new blogger, I know how great it is to get comments. But I myself am not good at commenting. Some of it is an intimidation thing…if you read the comments of popular blogs, you see the names of the same commenters over and over again. By commenting, I always feel as if it’s my first day at a new school and I’m trying to make friends. I know that’s not really the case, but it’s still how I feel. It can feel intimidating! So if the owners of any of these blogs come across this post, they may be surprised to find that I count myself among their fans, since they may not have seen my name on their comments list. But I hope they understand that I’m probably just one of the silent dozens/hundreds/thousands who also read without commenting regularly. I promise I’ll try to do better on that front!

A New Post!

I know, I know–I’ve been a bad blogger. Hmm, maybe I could find someone to give me a spanking

My love life has been hot and cold lately. Things with the Dark Horse are progressing v – e – r – y    s – l – o -w – l -y. I don’t think I ever mentioned this, but he spends most of his time in another state. It means that we don’t see each other on a daily or even weekly basis. So instead we burn up the phone lines, write long emails to each other, and IM regularly. The result is that our mental and emotional “relationship” has developed more quickly than our physical relationship. I do appreciate that he’s not a wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am kind of guy when we’re together. (LOL…never really thought of wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am in the BDSM realm, so I’m chuckling over that.) But the fact we don’t rush things in person, means it’s like one extended tease!

A side note

You’ll notice that a lot of these posts are going up at once. Some were already written, and I wanted to give this blog a critical mass of posts as I was getting started. Once I get going, I don’t anticipate posting as frequently!