I’m Back!

I wish I could say that I was off on a relaxing vacation, but it has actually been quite a few busy and exhausting weeks that’s included a couple guests from out-of-town, about 20 hours spent on airplanes, a couple weddings and the flu! But I’ve returned…I always do!

Is Everyone Pregnant?

Four friends have had babies in the last two months. In two instances, it was their first child, and for the other two, it was their second child.

In the last week, I’ve learned that another two are pregnant with first children. (And I will become aunt for the first time.)

One one hand, I’m thrilled for my friends. I love children, and relish the time that I get to spend with my friends’ and relatives’ offspring. But it’s also bittersweet. I want children myself–or, at least, want the opportunity to have children. But I’m getting older, and I’m unmarried. In many ways, I’m a traditionalist. I have no interest in having children out of wedlock, no adoption or artificial insemination or unintention pregnancies for me. I want to have the opportunity to stay home with my children while they’re young, and that’s tough to do as an unmarried mother (unless you’re independently wealthy or on welfare, of course).

So instead I congratulate my friends. It’s a heartfelt congratulation–I’m truly happy that they’re having children because in many ways I can live vicariously through them. But I still hope for one or two of my own some day.

I’ve Had a Bad Week

The past few days have been tough on me. I’ve tried to put on a happy face and think positive thoughts, but last night, shortly before heading to bed, I broke down in tears. Today I was just focused on getting through the day, and I don’t have plans tonight, so I’m just counting the hours until I can head to bed. I’m hoping tomorrow will be better.